Monthly Archives: May 2013

Learning to trust

Oh the new!

I’m sure you’ve felt it…

The crushing pressure of the ‘new’.

Here we are. A new blog…to accompany a new book…which together I hope will combine to offer a new story of life on earth.

How to start? Don’t you have to get it right first time? Make a bang, make a splash, make a lasting impression.

Probably.

The other option is to let go of the weight of your own expectations, to know that whilst you always aim to offer your best, your best will not be good enough for some. And that’s ok.

Because the other option is to trust.

Trust?

Trust that the person reading your words knows you are pouring your heart and soul into creating something that you hope, in some way, will enrich their life.

Trust that as you read my words, you are supportive, appreciative, wishing the best for us both.

Here’s the kicker though…I’ve got no way of knowing whether my trust is well placed. You might be an absolute ****.

Trust for a better world

But the world will swiftly become a cold, lonely and spiteful place if I choose to assume that you are a bit of a ****** who is sat there judging and hating me, instead of trusting that if I appeal to the best of you, you’ll give me your best.

Why have I chosen this seemingly simple topic as the way to start this ‘new’ blog?

Because this blog, and the book which sparked it to life, have two purposes: to explore how we can live more joyful, meaningful lives, and how by living those lives, we can be part of creating a better story of life on earth.

Trust is the absolute bedrock upon which both these noble aims are built.

But also, Trust needs people to stand up for it now more than ever.

Trust: the poor man of the West

Trust is in a bad way in the West.

We are told to trust governments who consistently lie to, and ignore the wishes of, the people. We are told to trust the official version of events, yet any possibility of investigating both sides of the story is prohibited, with information being “classified for national security”, or given an inhuman spin by media outlets that are beholden to the same corporate interests that have insidiously penetrated every level of what is supposed to be a fair and balanced impartial democracy.

Some laud the achievements of our civilized societies, yet all the while trust – the very quality that allows community to develop and flourish – is being systematically eroded? How can we have let such a state of affairs persist?

Sadly the answer lies in the economic model that we have allowed to dominate. The ‘growth for growth’s sake’ approach can necessarily only focus on one thing – the bottom line. This has meant companies doing whatever it takes to maximise their profit.

The ultimate consequence of this is a society where fear prevails. A populous that is deliberately kept anxious is easy to manipulate and sell stuff to: “You’re not beautiful enough! Buy this product.” “Arabs are terrorists! Vote for this war.”

Trusting Yourself

Living in such a society, it is truly a revolutionary act to trust yourself: to be secure in who you are and aware that the common humanity you share with all humans offers the basis for a profound and empowering trust.

But self-trust goes deeper than trusting your fellow man, rising above the fear-mongers and choosing to see the best in others. You could almost consider this the easy part.

Far trickier is to be able to trust the whisper of your heart, the song of your soul that affirms you have a gift of inestimable value to share with the world. To trust that you can be your true self and live your true purpose takes enormous courage.

Why? Because those who should most support your quest can often be the very ones who most oppose it, who most scorn and deride you for trying. These may be the people you most love and cherish, and when they do not trust your life vision – that you have a valuable gift, and that you are capable of giving it – the temptation to believe their point of view can be overwhelming.

Trusting the universe

Some give up, choosing to remain a fraction of their true potential as they submit to the crabs in a bucket seeking to drag them down.

Others, however, seek solace in a very particular type of trust, which is to surrender attachment to the outcome. Here, you accept that what will be will be, but not from a defeatist or apathetic position.

Rather, you trust that life does not make mistakes, and since life saw fit to place you upon this planet as a unique being among 7 billion others, you trust that you have a special contribution to make to the great unfolding of life.

You trust also that in essence life is not brutish and hopeless, but is in fact loving, compassionate and joyful. Trusting that this is so allows you to take one more trusting step – to trust that all you need do is follow your inspiration, and live what feels right for you right now. Nothing more, nothing less…surrendering your attachment and trusting that life will reveal the next step at just the right moment for you to take it.

Trusting your human brothers and sisters

That’s you sorted…but what about your fellow man/woman? Surely they need your help? Surely you should be doing more?

Here again is a lesson in trust.

With so much seemingly wrong with the world, it is quite possible that either or both of the following may happen, ultimately to the detriment of the world, since you will be drawn away from giving your unique gift as best you could.

Firstly, when confronted with all the ills of the world, you may feel that your gift has to be impacting millions in order for your life to have worth and meaning.

Secondly, you may find yourself questioning the value of your gift if it is not contributing to a domain of life that is commonly considered to be worthy and important.

In countering these two positions, it’s important to remember that one person’s beautiful is someone else’s ugly, as sure as one person’s terrorist is another’s freedom fighter.

You cannot claim the attention of everyone. There will be people who simply disagree with what you stand for. Brilliant! Life would be massively dull if everyone was the same.

You need only touch the hearts of those who value your value. If you have invented a fantastic new paintbrush, it will be of no interest to a demolitions expert…but painters will celebrate your gift.

Similarly, you need only be a match. A single match can light a fire that can burn for centuries. So…yes, may be you living your true self and sharing your gift won’t change a million lives overnight…but maybe it will change one…and that one may change everything.

Becoming comfortable with the idea that you need only serve who you can serve and be who you can be requires a hugely important and enriching act of trust: trusting that your brothers and sisters in our human family will play their part, and that all will be well.

This is a pretty massive leap to take, yet we can find firm footing by remembering the following:
When someone trusts you to give your best…what do you try and do? You try to give your best, right? In this respect, thankfully, you are not unique. There are far more people who will do the same than you could even dare to dream, and that is why you can trust your brothers and sisters, and why all will be well.

Trust that you don’t have to be original

As we come to the close of this trusting blog, let us build on the idea that nothing more is needed from you than to be your true self, happily aware that you are enough, that you do enough and that you give enough.

When you know the above with certainty, you stride confidently into each new day, thrilled to be sharing your gift.

One thing that can knock you off your stride, however, is the erroneous belief that you somehow have to be original, have to be fresh and new.

This is nothing but an outdated notion falteringly propped up by the crumbling façade of western capitalism, which places great status on whatever ‘the newest’ and ‘latest’ thing is, for the simple reason that a profit can be turned by selling you that ‘latest’, ‘newest’ thing.

The actual truth might be considered to be both more challenging and more comforting.

Comforting in that you do not have to try to be original, because you already are. You are unique in all the cosmos.

Challenging, however, because you do have to serve – ideally at a world-class level.

Cooking, writing, acting…whatever the area of your gift may be, it will be very hard to be game-changingly original…however, do not, for a moment, think this means you do not need to be outstanding. Quite the opposite, in fact.

When you seek to set a new standard in whatever area your gift may lie, you find that sweet spot where your innate originality meets the optimum way you can contribute…and at that point, you uplift all of life in a way that no one else can.

And all because you chose to trust.

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